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It’s Got Nothing to Do With You

Have you ever had people who check in with you, over and over, to make sure that your relationship is okay? Who is positive that everything you do is in direct relation to them and their lives. Oh, I can’t stress enough how much that isn’t true.

In response to those joyful people here is a list of things that I do, or don’t do, that have absolutely NOTHING to do with you—I promise.

It’s Got Nothing to Do with You

My Inability to Pick up the Phone Every Time You Call

I assure you, this has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact that I have a life. The same goes for not immediately answering a text message. In fact, if I don’t answer a text message in 5 minutes and then you call to make sure I have seen said text message…then my only problem with you is that you’re stalking me! I’m usually really great about getting back to people in a timely fashion but sometimes I’m mid cooking, showering, or otherwise busy and can’t get to the phone immediately.

When I Have to Cancel Plans

Again, I cannot stress how much this does not have to do with you. If I didn’t want to get together with you, I wouldn’t have made the plans in the first place. If I’m canceling plans it’s because I’m sick, or an emergency came up, or some other event caused me to have to alter my schedule. I promise to try not to do it to you often and that I feel bad about it, but it’s not about you personally-I swear.

My Dislike of Things You Love

I am strange. I hate things most people love and love things most people hate. I have never seen Star Wars but I live for bad SyFy movies. So if I hate the kind of music you love, the food you enjoy, or the past times that you live for…don’t take it personally. It’s not about you! It’s called having different interests and being an individual.

When I Say I’m Busy

This isn’t a blow off. It’s not me trying to avoid speaking to you, getting together with you, or rush you off the phone. I am legit busy, like always. You are a priority to me. I have made you one by keeping you in this crazy hectic life of mine. Trust me when I say that I don’t have time to waste in this life of mine so I cut the dead weight and if you’re around it’s because you are special to me. So, no, I’m not mad at you or avoiding you, I am just genuinely and completely busy.

It’s hard sometimes to remember to keep things in perspective. You never know what is going on with other people, what is happening in their lives, but don’t assume that their actions are a reflection on how they feel about you. You can always ask, once tops, if things are okay between you both but remember that if they say yes–believe them!

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Small Victories

So, I don’t know if you guys know this about me, but I have always kinda hated my voice. Which is silly because my sisters and I all have very similar voices (like our parents sometimes can’t tell us apart) and I think theirs are great. When I heard myself on my voicemail, in a message, or in family videos, I always thought I sounded like a dude. My voice has a deeper quality to it and I didn’t think it was feminine enough.

I was wrong.

It didn’t take me too long to realize that my voice was actually really sexy. It’s got that bedroom quality without the rasp of a lifelong smoker. I don’t know that I ever truly owned it though until I started to do some radio spots. Of course I would podcast them afterwards to make sure I hadn’t made a fool out of myself (I haven’t yet).

It helps to have my business partners tell me that they loved my radio voice, too. Hell, they recently pitched me doing some voice over work for the company…and I kinda love it. I did our Indie Chick radio show last week with Chrystal and again was told that my voice was great for radio. *blush* I kinda get a rush on the intro that I recorded as well…not gonna lie. (You can listen to the podcast all about Girl Code by clicking here.)

I also think putting my voice (and face) out into the world on my YouTube channel helped as well. I know for my readers (here and on The Indie Chicks) that seeing and hearing me adds another level of connection to my writing and my ‘voice’ as a writer.

So it may sound silly, but it was quite a personal victory to finally come to love something that I used to not like about myself. It’s the small things that add up to loving yourself the way you should. I chipped a way a small insecurity and turned it into a huge positive and that’s a pretty great feeling.

I’d love to hear from you now. What’s something that you used to not like about yourself that you’ve come to love?? Please share.

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